Weekend Blues

Unfortunately, working overtime this weekend, making it a 50 hour work week. At least I have tomorrow and Tuesday off.

Can’t sleep that much tonight, I suppose. Been thinking a lot about what’s going on in life lately. So far everything has been focused around going to work, and coming home and playing guitar.

Put in perspective, playing guitar, makes everything I’ve done in the last few years seem rather trivial. I’m just amazed I’ve had my guitar locked up for nearly 5 years unplayed, mainly due to lack of direction in learning how to play it, and now the only thing I can think about is playing it.

What I mean about “trivial” is that in the last few years I’ve been seeking a form of escape through means of entertainment. I’ve looked at simulators, video games, board games, comic books, TV series, figure collecting, anime, etc. I’m looking for some thing. A certain zest in life.

Video games particularly are a money pit, for me they provide a temporary thrill that lasts a few weeks before I move on to the next game. I can find myself spending $100 a month on video games, easily. That’s $1200 a year. When you include other forms of entertainment, you can see why I’m just barely breaking even in the bank each month.

With music, however, I don’t feel trapped in this endless loop of constantly keeping up on new forms of entertainment to keep me from being bored. I’m actually creating something. It takes a lot of hard work, daily practice, and determination…but with the progress I’ve made in the last couple of weeks I’m actually seeing improvement. That improvement is what’s driving me to keep moving on.

It certainly helps to have the right resource, however, to keep at it. I’ve tried practicing through several different resources and now finding one that works. The first resource I tried was simply through reading a book. It’s okay for learning simple melodies like “Ode to Joy” or “He’s a Jolly Good Fellow”, but quite frankly it’s boring as fuck.

The other resource I went to was Guitar Tricks, which is not bad, but not particularly what I want either. Basically I’m going through the training and wanting more than just practicing single strings. Yet the instructor will go through something like six-string melodies, sing a simple song she made (which isn’t really my taste), and she’ll play this boring song extremely fast. I’ve been feeling really discouraged as I not only can’t keep up with her, but I’m simply just bored and not sure at what point I should give up and move to the next lesson.

The last resource is Justin Guitar, and I’ve seen a huge amount of progress in the last three days, than in the last two weeks through the other two resources. He’s started off with three chords: A-D-E, gives you training exercises, listening exercises, and plenty of real songs that utilize those chords that I can practice with. Already I’m getting better at the transitioning between those three chords, and I can play Bob Marley’s Three Little Birds rather well. That’s huge.

So yesterday I ordered one of his songbooks and a beginner course through next-day shipping. I also ordered an old-school metronome as well. I really want to support his efforts (given that he gives his training for free), and I also would like physical copies I can utilize offline for guidance and training.

I’m also playing with an acoustic now. It’s no replacement for the electric but it’s a nice beginner guitar that I can play in other rooms without lugging around a giant amp.

I think there’s a bit more of an added benefit of music than just relieving boredom. It’s somehow therapeutic. After dealing with that I’m calling “passive depression”, in which I am constantly looking for an escape from the mundane life…constantly feeling dissatisfied…bored…unmotivated. I’m actually doing something that challenges me physically, mentally, and stimulates me in such a way that no video game or TV show ever has.

With that said, what are my plans for the week?

With TV, there are only three things I want to watch: Soccer, Formula 1, and Wrestling. These three sports I’ve always enjoyed, and it makes sense to get back into something live and unpredictable other than just browsing through Netflix looking for the next show to watch.

With gaming: FIFA 19, F1 2019, and WWE2K19. Obviously because of the above…but also because I’m just simply burned out of games. I’m just not in the mood to run around, shoot things, or go through some obtuse JRPG mechanics. I just want to sit down and enjoy something that’s simply fun.

The rest of my time, I’m just devoured in learning music and guitar. I just don’t need to do anything extra at this time. And I’m okay with that.

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